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  • Writer's pictureStand Sure In Life

How To Change Your Mindset

When stuff happens in life it has an impact. Sometimes we’ll say it’s good, other times bad. In this blog I’m going to write about how changing your mindset can really help you move forward in life.



Thoughts

Thoughts. We all get them…all the time. But what if I was to tell you that they can all help you to where you want to be? Say you want to get a new job but you keep having negative thoughts about that. Don’t think of the negative thoughts as “bad”. Rather use them to look at what needs work before you get to where you want to be. Similarly positive thoughts aren’t “good”, they can instead be used as an indicator to continue doing what you’re doing. Neutral thoughts are useful to keep track of where you’re going.



Reframe

Many of us have a tendency to be dramatic in the way we describe how we’re feeling; but if we can change this we can reframe outlook. For example, don’t say “I’m sad”, rather say “I am feeling sad.” By doing this you are commenting on an experience as opposed to making a definition of who you are. By reframing things this way you are acknowledging the fact that experiences pass. This is true for “good” and “bad” experiences. Nothing lasts forever, and thankfully a lot of what we experience is comparatively short lived.



Lesson

Which brings me on to the next change of mindset. Everything we experience is a potential lesson. While it may be true that nothing lasts forever, it is also true that you can learn a lesson that’ll last a lifetime…if you let yourself do so. For example, if you’re feeling happy look at why you are and do more to make yourself feel this way more often. If you’re feeling stressed, angry, sad, or whatever look at what might be causing it and do less of that. If it is a situation or person that’s causing this the lesson could be to avoid that place or person.



Perspective

I know that some of you will have read the previous sentence and gone “But I can’t avoid family” or “It’s my job, I can’t leave”. Well, that’s not entirely true. You need to set boundaries; and I’ll be writing about that in a future blog. If you’re not happy in your work figure out why and do something about it. If leaving isn’t an option then talk to someone about how you’re feeling or change your mindset and look at it as a lesson that you need.



Control

No one controls your feelings but you. Circumstances don’t make you angry, you choose to get angry. Sometimes it’s good to have a short sharp burst of anger but not frequently. It is worth remembering that we cannot change (or control (fully)) what happens to us but we can change how we respond. When someone annoys you with their behaviour or actions, it’s unlikely they’re deliberately going out of their way to upset you. In much the same way technology isn’t sentient and deciding to crash because it knows it’ll piss you off.


Quotes

To end this blog here are some quotes that will drive the thought home…I hope!



“We can complain because roses have thorns, or rejoice because thorns have roses.”





“If you focus on the hurt, you will continue to suffer. If you focus on the lesson you will continue to grow.” Buddha


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